writings

Choice

February 1, 2013 ·

 

About 16 years ago, two years after my initial spiritual awakening, I remember having an epiphany about Choice. “We don’t have any!” I would proclaim to anyone who would listen. “We are either operating out of our programming, which is not our choice; or we are operating out of Pure Awareness, which is not programmed, and is also, therefore, not our choice. And it is not even our choice which one we are operating out of!!”
 
That is how I saw it then. I walked around in wonder as I watched my own actions: those imbued with the sweet aroma of Grace, and those that positively reeked of the opposite :) . Either way, I knew they were not my choice. There was neither praise for the good, nor blame for the bad, because I knew I had absolutely nothing to do with either one.
 
Insights of this magnitude can hardly avoid being applied universally, and for me, this was no exception. What that means is that I was regarding everyone else in my whole Universe with the same total absence of judgment.
 
Those were happy days, but alas, the honeymoon came to an end. What evolved was this: the acts originating from my unconsciousness, even without the overlay of blame and judgment, became increasingly unpalatable to me. What I came to discover was that the only way I could avoid them and be ever more masterful in my life was to act, in every minute, as if I really did have the choice. In fact, the more responsibility I took for my choices about everything (and this is still true), the more empowered and the more masterful I became in my life.
 
Now, back to that first mega-insight about Choice. While the honeymoon did end, what is still with me today is a fundamental, natural distrust of anything that sounds like personal praise, personal blame, or personal judgment. Why? Because something in me – that I cannot shake – knows it has to be false.
 
There IS one kind of praise, however, that will still ring true to this day:
 
Praise for the Universal Oneness that exists (choicelessly) at the heart of all Being;
for That which makes the whole illusion of Choice possible;
for That which fills us all with the gifts and talents and acts of selflessness and heroism that we embody every single day;
 
Praise for THAT [which in plain language is identical to the state of GRATITUDE];
 
Well…
 
I have yet to find a kink in that one!
 
:)
 
 

Comments

One Response to “Choice”

  1. steven on February 1st, 2013 5:28 pm

    Right. :)

    This idea of “there is no choice and no free will” is just another way to get stuck in the dualistic mind and making spirituality into dogmatic adwaita-religion. It is just believing the opposite of what you used to believe. That is all.

    And that then would be ‘Freedom’?!
    Freedom from the mind and everything that appears??
    Nagh…

    Of course there is free will. And of course there isn’t.
    And that is not a paradox. Not! the whole discussion is like arguing about whether a flower is opening, or nature is opening the flower. Totally useless.

    Besides – just for the hairsplitters reading this -, even the understanding that free will is an illusion, is an illusion. So, then why believe it?

    The recognition of how everything just happens as it does can be a great way to help ‘pointing at’ the Self. That is just it.

    An old Indian proverb says: “Thoughts are like thorns. When one gets stuck in the skin and leaves a splinter, you pick another one to take the splinter out. Then you discard both.”

    Both!

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